Welcome to MovieJawn’s Split Decision! Each week, Ryan will pose a question to our staff of knowledgable and passionate film lovers and share the responses. Chime in on Twitter, Facebook, our Instagram, or in the comments below.

This week’s question:

What movie should retroactively be revealed to be from The Book of Saw?

I adore The Truman Show, but it does seem to fit the Saw mode of performing life-ruining ”experiments” on unwitting victims for the purpose of entertainment. –Ryan Silberstein, The Red Herring

I’d love for The Book of Henry to get a “Live. Die. Repeat.”-style renaming and become The Book of Henry: From The Book of Saw. I am a simple man who doesn’t ask for much, and would love for a retcon that explains all of the nightmare stuff that happens in The Book of Henry to be explained away with a simple “the story takes place in an evil world where amorality is a virtue.” I would also like to be able to quote scenes from The Book of Henry like scripture, i.e. “Remember when Sarah Silverman kisses that terminally ill sociopath child in The Book of Henry, scene 4, The Book of Saw film 8.” Also I would like to see Colin Trevorrow in a reverse bear trap. I know he doesn’t play a character in The Book of Henry, that’s just something I’d like to see happen. –Alex Rudolph, Staff Writer (PS: I know you love The Book of Henry, Gary)

While it would be darkly funny to have The Notebook: From the Book of Saw, and watch Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams get doused with say, acid instead of rain (or maybe just acid rain) when they kiss, but that would be cruel. I love The Pillow Book, and know Peter Greenaway’s films can be torture for some folks, but not me. Then again, I am an art film snob who loves the Saw movies. So I’ll go with Green Book: From the Book of Saw because that film was absolutely excruciating.–Gary M. Kramer, Staff Writer (PS: I looooove The Book of Henry, Alex).

Both Alex and Gary are on the same page with my initial thought: What if all the “Book” movies were Books of Saw? “The Green Book of Saw”, “The Silver Linings Playbook of Saw”, “The Jungle Book of Saw”. But in sticking closer to the ‘torturous viewing experience’ idea, it would probably be a drastic improvement if some of those latter (as in post- With a Vengeance) Die Hard sequels had turned out to have a dastardly puppet as the one pulling the strings. It would give them a memorable villain anyway (apologies to Tim Olyphant: love ya buddy but Live Free of Die Hard just don’t hit). –“Doc” Hunter Bush, Staff Writer (I’ve never seen Book of Henry. I assume it’s a prequel to Book of Eli.)

ve always thought that the Saw franchise would be too much for me, but when it comes to torture, there’s no way anything could be worse than Sans Soleil. Throughout the pandemic, my boyfriend and I have been working our way through the Sight & Sound list of 100 Greatest Films of All Time and not even 10 hours of Shoah compares to how miserable it was getting through 100 minutes of Chris Marker’s unenlightening and exoticising collection of spare footage. Years of my life would pass by and I’d check the time to see that it had only been five minutes. If I can make it through Sans Soleil: From the Book of Saw, then I might as well give an actual Saw movie a shot… –Ryan Smillie, Staff Writer

While not an entire movie, I think that Pee-Wee Herman’s breakfast machine is definitely Book of Saw material. Triggered by his mere waking, the machine takes a roundabout approach to creating a “Mr. Breakfast” pancake meal, which Pee-Wee then covers with a pile of Mr. T cereal. The true horror occurs when Pee-Wee eats a single piece of the cereal and then goes about his day. Who resets the machine? Who cleans up yesterday’s breakfast? What does Pee-Wee do with the waste? 

Eat or don’t, Mr. Herman. Make a choice. –Dan Scully, Staff Writer