by J †Johnson, Staff Writer 

Dragula: Season 666
A Boulet Brothers’ Dragula Season 666 Serial Commentary
Episode 9 “Dead By Daylight”
Now streaming on Shudder

It’s never late than never.
—Yuri 

Asia is touching every single tarantula.
—Grey Matter 

Love the talons.
—Swanthula

A dragon with a dump truck is awesome to see.
—Mathieu Cote 

I hate to be a bitch all the time.
—Auntie Heroine

Seems pretty snappy to me.
—Yuri 

cunty recognize cunty / wet recognize wet
—Niohuru X 

…the skin and the fur and the bones and the blood…
—Swanthula 

BAHHH!
—Grey Matter

Are you gonna kill me?
—Yuri

Kill you, Yuri, no!
—Dracmorda 

No Last Supper for you, uglies. Let that be a lesson to you to be nicer to your favorite (and least favorite) drag monsters online. The Boulets have a point that the cast tends to get self-conscious (and calculated) in their hesitation to lash out at the family meal, knowing too well that there are lots of thirsty trolls ready to strike at their keyboards from the very depths of their parent’s homes. And yet, Last Supper episodes are the highlight of every season, from the ceremony to raise the dead to table shade and the airing of grievances—plus the killer fits, as everyone has one last chance to slay. Truly it’s a hot mess and we don’t blame the Boulets for sidestepping the burden of trying to top their best episodes. Just like those of us who prefer to phone in the holidays rather than restage our most toxic family encounters, the Boulets said “Not tonight!”

So, fine, we’ll dip our hands in spiders, dress like video game versions of the ultimate social outcasts, and hunt for tiny coffins while being sprayed with paintballs. And we’ll like it!

For all the delights in this episode—Auntie subtly declining to return Yuri’s gooey compliments, Asia in all her Nerd Queen Glory, that sound Grey keeps making, the Boulets in their true form as vampire batpig mermaids—we can’t help imagining what would have been if we got the whole crew together to smile and cut and cry a tear or two. Ah well, maybe next year. And if we need some rude behavior in the meanwhile, we know where to find it.

OK, but did you clock the flutter in Pi’s eyelids during the extermination flashback? Oh, if it were anything but a twitch of the death nerve, and sweet Pi would return! Alas, we couldn’t have been more wrong about monsters coming back from the dead. We promise to get over it, but “Not tonight!”

And we lose another one this week. Sure, it happens all the time in this slasher serial, but the last few have hurt a little more. Well, they all hurt, even the early ones when we don’t know what we’re losing. And here’s another way that if we let it, Dragula opens to the wider world of Dragula. Follow them all online, look out for them coming to a city near you, and celebrate the ways this show brings out the monster in these artists. Maybe they only had a scene or two, but there’s a whole world of drag out there, and the less we see onscreen, the more there is to learn as people present themselves on their own terms. 

The drama of Yuri over the past few weeks has been something special, though. We love an underdog, and Yuri hung in there among the very best competitors of Season 666. 

And yet. It does seem a little convenient that the other undeniable frontrunner, Pi, was eliminated from competition on a week when they could have won the challenge. The Boulets and other judges didn’t love Pi’s Hunky Toxic Avenger Frankenhooker, but look again if you don’t recall Pi coming in like a wrecking ball, throwing themselves all over that car. That shit was fire.

And if we’re setting up the inevitable top three of Asia, Grey, and Auntie, taking out the person who could legitimately challenge any of them is the way to make sure that happens. And this is no shade to Yuri, who has lit up every episode with their looks (despite all the crushed velvet) and radiant self-deprecatory personality.

Which brings us to an ugly moment in the cauldron, where Auntie bullies Yuri with a classic Dish & Blame technique. No doubt the edit amplifies and maybe warps the moment, but it’s truly a bad look for Auntie to shut Yuri down when they try to come back on Auntie’s reads. And it hurts to see Yuri shrink and apologize instead of sticking up for themself, just like it’s disappointing to see no one have their back (again). Auntie, and everyone else, is better than this—witness Asia standing up for Pi’s drag—and we look forward to seeing that in the final episode.

Let’s go out though on a note of celebration. Asia wins the challenge (and the digital skin) and is beautiful in her triumph: “Bitch, I’m in the top fucking three of Dragula, my favorite fucking show!” Notice, also, the way she takes the stage for judgment, like she has already won. Because she has.

Oh, but we also have to mention one of the longest and funniest exterminations in Dragula history, and a fitting tribute to a real sweetheart and fantastic comic actor. Yuri escapes and escapes and escapes again—Not tonight!—and just when we think they’re going to escape a few more times and get Jason-ed in their kitchen several weeks later, the Boulets blow up that motherfucking plane. Vampire’s kiss, ladies.

Things to watch for: 

† Glamour: advantage Auntie

† Horror: advantage Grey

† Filth: advantage Asia

† Who can hold their category and steal another one? That person will be crowned Dragula, Supermonster 666.

† One last swerve? Fuck it, bring back everyone!